And in the quiet hours of the morning of Friday, March 22nd, Ken's fight finally ended.
Obituary
Kenneth Bryant Thulen, 38, of Windsor, passed away peacefully at home on Friday, March 22, 2013, surrounded by his family, after battling colorectal cancer. He was born November 7, 1974 in Hartford and grew up in Windsor, graduating from Windsor High School in 1994. He played Varsity Hockey and Lacrosse and went on to coach Windsor Youth Hockey. Despite the good natured ribbing from his friends, he managed the Windsor Girls Field Hockey Team; at times participating in practice as though he was a player. He also played adult league indoor soccer and taught snowboarding. Kenny loved the outdoors and being active. He enjoyed hiking, snowboarding, fishing, kayaking and his visits to Key West, FL. He was also an avid New York Yankees fan. Kenny lived in Vermont, New Hampshire, and Colorado before moving back home to be near his family. He was a fun uncle, who loved his family dearly and will be remembered for his loyalty and willingness to do anything to help others. He will also be remembered for his ability to always make you laugh, whether it was from his horrible jokes or silly antics. That ability even crossed over into a career as a Chili's manager. He could often be heard saying that he needed to go to work to save lives, "If people don't eat, they die." He is survived by his wife, Nicole (Bolduc) Thulen, his father, Philip Thulen, Jr. and wife Paula of Windsor; his mother, Virginia Thulen and her partner Walter Jabs, Jr. of Springfield, VT; his brother, Philip Thulen III and his girlfriend Brenda Ransford of Windsor; his sister, Brenda Soriano and her husband Jon of Sandy Hook; nieces, Shelby Cosgrove, Sophia Soriano, and Maci Thulen, nephews, Christopher Thulen, Noah Thulen, Owen Thulen and Joseph Soriano. He also leaves his dogs, Lily and Cookie. His family will receive friends on Friday, March 29, from 4-7 p.m. at the Carmon Windsor Funeral Home, 807 Bloomfield Ave., Windsor. A celebration of Kenny's life will be held on Saturday, March 30, at 12 p.m., also at Carmon Windsor Funeral Home. Donations in his memory may be made to the St. Jude Children's Research Hospital, 501 St. Jude Place, Memphis, TN 38105. For online condolences please visit www.carmonfuneralhome.com.
On Friday, March 30th his family and I recieved over 400 people, in a room full of our favorite moments with Ken. And on Saturday, March 31st, we celebrated his life. Guests traveled from as far as California and Colorado to be with us that day and helped to make it a true celebration! Here are my final words...
Good afternoon everyone and thank you for coming today. Before I begin I would like to thank the 100’s of people who stood in line for upwards of 90 minutes last night to pay their respects and to share their stories about Ken with me and his family. I would also like to thank all of the people who traveled here on this holiday weekend to help us celebrate Ken’s life. Thank you to the countless health care professionals in Colorado, New Hampshire and Connecticut, without all of them, this fight would have been impossible. Thank you to Carmons for turning our vision into an impeccable display. Thank you to my friends and family for your unwavering love and support throughout the most trying times. And to Ken’s friends and most of all his Family: Phil, Paula, Ginny, Walt, Brenda, Jon, Sophia, Joseph, Phil, Brenda, Lori, Christopher, Shelby, Noah, and Owen…it is because of you all that Ken was the man these people are here to celebrate today, and the way through which his memory lives on.
I hesitated, at first, to stand up and speak, because I run the risk of this sounding more like a roast than a eulogy. So I have to throw in this disclaimer that any jokes are meant to be made and taken in good fun…because if there was anyone who liked to make a joke, it was Ken. So here goes…
A few weeks ago, the mother of one of Ken’s good friends came to the house and I don’t have her exact quote, but I went something like, “Kenny is the most annoying person I have ever loved.” And for those of you who know Ken, know that this statement is completely accurate.
The first time I met Ken, I didn’t like him. And the second time I met Ken, I didn’t like him. And it wasn’t until the third time I met Ken that I thought, hmmm…maybe I kind of like him? Ken never had a problem letting his inner child come out. And for those of you who know me, know I’m more of a neat, clean, organized, must be in control, some may even say type A personality. Ken’s approach to life was so foreign to me. But for some reason we clicked…
A few years later, Ken and I got married and moved to Colorado, a dream come true for both of us. Out there, we attacked life, seizing every opportunity that came our way. We traveled locally, attended countless sporting events, went to the theatre, hiked, and skied at several mountains...well, let’s be honest, Ken snowboarded…I complained about cold and early it was. We hit up countless tourist hot spots and with Ken’s constant support, I was even able to complete my Master’s degree.
Ken taught me how to approach life without fear. He showed me that life didn’t need to be a checklist, but a bucket list. He taught me to see the lighter side of things, to find the positive in every situation, to laugh at myself. He showed me that manners still have a place in today’s society. And taught me the true definition of unconditional love.
When Ken got diagnosed, he may not have fought against this disease the way you would, or the way I would, or the way any of us thought it should be fought…Ken fought it his way and he stayed true to himself, always allowing his inner child to be present.
I can remember when the doctor first gave Ken a prescription for pain killers. A few weeks went by and she was shocked that the prescription didn’t need to be filled. Ken’s responded without hesitation, “oh I haven’t been taking them, I don’t want to get addicted”…he always refused to allow others to believe that this disease was beating him, even if he didn’t believe it himself.
And just a few months ago when Ken was in the hospital with a chest tube the doctor told him that he was going to need to get a flu shot. He replied, “oh…don’t those hurt?” The doctor looked at him totally perplexed and she said, Ken…you have a chest tube, one of the most painful procedures…a flu shot is nothing compared to this…but that was Ken, so innocent and completely unaware of his own strength.
In the wake of this disease, Ken remained; fun loving and free spirited, polite and caring…oftentimes moreso for others than he ever did for himself. He remained loyal and committed to his family and to me. And in the wake of this disease, I believe that Ken became the man he had always wanted to be. Brave and strong, able to set boundaries and advocate for himself. And knowing his fight was nearing its end, he stared death in the face and bravely gifted his prized possessions.
So many people have asked WHY. And I can’t stand here and say I know why Ken Thulen. But I can see the lessons I was supposed to learn from this and I can see the healing that has been given to this family, despite an enormous loss. So, TODAY, I challenge you, to think about what lesson it is you have learned by knowing this amazing man. Because to walk away from this, from all of this, and not have learned any lesson at all, is the true tragedy.
It is said that life is not a matter of milestones, but of moments. If this is true, then Ken lived a wonderful life filled with many, many special moments, as you can see by the pictures around the room. It is my hope that you all get to live such a special life.
I hesitated, at first, to stand up and speak, because I run the risk of this sounding more like a roast than a eulogy. So I have to throw in this disclaimer that any jokes are meant to be made and taken in good fun…because if there was anyone who liked to make a joke, it was Ken. So here goes…
A few weeks ago, the mother of one of Ken’s good friends came to the house and I don’t have her exact quote, but I went something like, “Kenny is the most annoying person I have ever loved.” And for those of you who know Ken, know that this statement is completely accurate.
The first time I met Ken, I didn’t like him. And the second time I met Ken, I didn’t like him. And it wasn’t until the third time I met Ken that I thought, hmmm…maybe I kind of like him? Ken never had a problem letting his inner child come out. And for those of you who know me, know I’m more of a neat, clean, organized, must be in control, some may even say type A personality. Ken’s approach to life was so foreign to me. But for some reason we clicked…
A few years later, Ken and I got married and moved to Colorado, a dream come true for both of us. Out there, we attacked life, seizing every opportunity that came our way. We traveled locally, attended countless sporting events, went to the theatre, hiked, and skied at several mountains...well, let’s be honest, Ken snowboarded…I complained about cold and early it was. We hit up countless tourist hot spots and with Ken’s constant support, I was even able to complete my Master’s degree.
Ken taught me how to approach life without fear. He showed me that life didn’t need to be a checklist, but a bucket list. He taught me to see the lighter side of things, to find the positive in every situation, to laugh at myself. He showed me that manners still have a place in today’s society. And taught me the true definition of unconditional love.
When Ken got diagnosed, he may not have fought against this disease the way you would, or the way I would, or the way any of us thought it should be fought…Ken fought it his way and he stayed true to himself, always allowing his inner child to be present.
I can remember when the doctor first gave Ken a prescription for pain killers. A few weeks went by and she was shocked that the prescription didn’t need to be filled. Ken’s responded without hesitation, “oh I haven’t been taking them, I don’t want to get addicted”…he always refused to allow others to believe that this disease was beating him, even if he didn’t believe it himself.
And just a few months ago when Ken was in the hospital with a chest tube the doctor told him that he was going to need to get a flu shot. He replied, “oh…don’t those hurt?” The doctor looked at him totally perplexed and she said, Ken…you have a chest tube, one of the most painful procedures…a flu shot is nothing compared to this…but that was Ken, so innocent and completely unaware of his own strength.
In the wake of this disease, Ken remained; fun loving and free spirited, polite and caring…oftentimes moreso for others than he ever did for himself. He remained loyal and committed to his family and to me. And in the wake of this disease, I believe that Ken became the man he had always wanted to be. Brave and strong, able to set boundaries and advocate for himself. And knowing his fight was nearing its end, he stared death in the face and bravely gifted his prized possessions.
So many people have asked WHY. And I can’t stand here and say I know why Ken Thulen. But I can see the lessons I was supposed to learn from this and I can see the healing that has been given to this family, despite an enormous loss. So, TODAY, I challenge you, to think about what lesson it is you have learned by knowing this amazing man. Because to walk away from this, from all of this, and not have learned any lesson at all, is the true tragedy.
It is said that life is not a matter of milestones, but of moments. If this is true, then Ken lived a wonderful life filled with many, many special moments, as you can see by the pictures around the room. It is my hope that you all get to live such a special life.
THANK YOU ALL FOR TUNING IN...AND BEING A PART OF THIS FIGHT WITH US. BEFORE I GO...JUST A LITTLE FOOD FOR THOUGH...
In the US, 1 person under the age of 40 is diagnosed with cancer every 8 minutes.
Of cancers that affect both men and women, colorectal cancer is the second leading cause of cancer-related deaths in the United States & the third most common cancer in men and in women.
The chance that you will know someone with cancer in your lifetime is 100%.
The chance that it will be you: 33% for women, 50% for men.
Colon and rectal cancer can be prevented!
By finding and removing precancerous polyps that can develop into cancer, colorectal cancer can be stopped before it ever starts!
www.cancer.org/coloncancer.
Hi Nicole. I just wanted to give my regards. I'm don't check FB often and just heard of Kens passing. We worked together at Chili's in W.Leb. Ken was an amazing and happy guy. Your blog is beautiful and shows how he embraced life fiercely.
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